October 2, 2013

The truth about transferring.

     Although last Friday was filled with lots of blogging fun, this has been one of the worst weeks that I've had in a long time. The last time that I was feeling this down was last April, when I was going through both the transferring process and the process of making up tons of homework after I'd missed over two weeks of classes for being sick (blogged about that here). During that stressful time for me last Spring, all that I wanted was to be out of my former college and at my new school. I envisioned sorority life and city living, and it seemed wonderful. Now it's almost six months after that, and sometimes I want nothing more then to be back at my former school... you never know what you have until it's gone.


My first-ever visit to my former college, when I was a senior in high school in February 2012!

     
     Transferring has been hard, really hard. It's been one of the most emotional things that I've ever had to go through in my life, and the thing was that I wasn't expecting that at all! When I first moved away to college in August 2012, I settled in better than I ever though! The number of times that I got homesick for Maine that semester I can count on one hand, and I really just was so happy to finally be living in the South and away from high school. My old school's campus had this amazing friendly vibe to it, which I think made it the main reason why I picked that school in the first place. I always felt like I could talk to anyone there, everyone seemed approachable and friendly, even if we weren't in the same friend group! I was well-known and well-liked on campus, so many people were shocked when I announced that I was transferring. 

My suite that I lived in last year all decorated for the holidays! 


     Don't get me wrong, there were a lot of things that I hated about my old school, such as:
  • The food (it was practically not edible)
  • The location (the school was out in the middle of nowhere so I spent a lot of money on gas since I enjoyed going off campus a lot)
  • The program for my major (enough said)
  • The lack of an infirmary or any sort of medical plan for when out-of-state students like myself get very sick

     ^ The above reasons were what lead me to transfer, and those are very valid reasons. I do honestly believe that had I stayed at my old school, I wouldn't have gotten the best education and it would have been a lot harder for me to find a job in radio after graduation. But despite all of those things that I remember that I hated, I still miss it so much.

A group of some of us girls who all went to the same church on Sunday mornings last year! We would all have breakfast together and then carpool over (with some guys too!). I just can't get over how long my hair was then!


     I have had such a hard time fitting in at my new school. I feel that a lot of people here are unapproachable, especially the guys. Social groups definitely have already formed here, and it's hard as a transfer to break into that when it's such a small school. Partying is also VERY prevelant, and I'm not used to that since my former school had a dry campus, and I didn't hang out with anyone who enjoyed partying. The good news is that I haven't felt like there's a lot of "peer pressure" here to drink. People seem fine with the fact that going to bars on Thursday nights (which 90% of the students here do) or going to parties with alcohol and drugs don't interest me, but it's more that I am feeling left out since so many people do that.  I'm just so against so many of the things that all of the students around me are doing. I also feel very inexpereienced since this is more of a "hook-up" school, and I've still never even had an official boyfriend. Just like with the drinking, I have no desire to hook-up with any guys! But there are very, very few Christian guys here, and at this rate I may be single permanently until college graduation. 

     Joining a sorority has overall been a good thing for me. I really like Alpha Delta Pi as an organization, and I am excited for all of the events to come throughout the course of the year. But joining a sorority has also been very stressful. I don't need to go into detail here, but just like anything else in life, a sorority isn't 100% perfect and without flaws. I think that ADPi is the right one for me, but it has also added some stress into my life that hasn't helped on top of what else I've been dealing with.

     My parents have been away this week in Las Vegas because my dad has a work conference out there. Not only am I SUPER jealous that my mom gets to be back there just three and a half months after we went this summer, but I have really missed talking to my parents for the last few days. With the time difference, the hours of my dad's conference, the fact that my mom forgot her cellphone and all of the things that they're doing it's been really hard for me to reach them. Normally I can go awhile without speaking to them as much, but since I've been having such a hard week there have been so  many times that I've wanted to call them and cry, but I haven't been able to get ahold of them very well. 

     On Monday evening I had an information sesson/informal interview for a communications internship that I really want for next semester! Internship opportunities like this are one of the main reasons that I transferred! I hope that I will get a call or e-mail back this week for my second interview, and I guess I've been stressing about that as well. 


     I know that being at this new school was apart of God's plan for me, and I'm trying so hard to trust in Him. But it's just been a lot harder than I expected. I haven't even enjoyed living in the city as much as I thought. I rarely go off campus- only usually if I need groceries (and a couple Bojangles trips of course). Funny how I seemed to get out a lot more last year even though I was so far away from everything. 


     I would appreciate any prayers for strength for getting through this week. This upcoming weekend I'm going home with my roommate to her house in South Carolina, and I think it will be good for me to get away for a bit. And my best friend from high school, Jules, is coming to visit me down here in just a little over two weeks! I can't wait, and that couldn't be coming at a better time. 


      xoxo Miss ALK

10 comments:

  1. Phew,, you are in a lot. I am also having a hard time learning to let go, but life currently just Shows me that it is worth it. Praying for you!

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  2. It seems like you're going through a lot. I'll be praying for you, girl! I felt that way a lot a few weeks ago, so I definitely know how you feel. Things will look up in time, don't worry!

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  3. Sending lots and lots of prayers your way, sweet girl! This post was something I really needed to see...I was thisclose to transferring this year, but after a lot of back and forth I decided to finish my undergraduate degree here. I still sometimes regret not transferring, but this post helped because it reminded me that there would have been good and bad in that situation, too.

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  4. Bless your heart!! I'm sorry!! I'll pray for you, & I hope you get a call back!! That would def be a good change :)

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  5. I'm so glad that you have found some joy and peace through joining ADPi! I really think joining Gamma Phi my sophomore year really helped my school feel much smaller and homier than it was. I am so excited to have found your blog via Mason's and Caitlin's! I'm in Raleigh and I love finding other NC bloggers! xoxo

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  6. I know it has been hard but you know I am always here. You remind me so much of myself a few years ago. Just keep going and remember that God will guide you through this. Love you!

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  7. Oh, girl. I didn't transfer but I thought about it. I can see how it would be so hard. I will absolutely pray for you. I will probably be single until graduation at the rate I'm going too, haha ;)

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  8. Praying for you girl. This transition has not been easy, but there will be a great ending to it all. God has led you to this school for a reason and I hope he shows you why very soon. Hang in there!

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  9. 100% agree with you. Transferring has made this semester quite an adjustment. You definitely don't realize what you have until it is gone. I swear we are living parallel lives. I'm always here to talk. I'm sending positive thoughts your way!

    Xoxo
    -mQs-

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  10. Sororites are an adjustment! They take up a lot more time and put pressure on you that most people don't realize. (Pressure for grades, to get your homecoming hours down, attend mixers, ETC.) They are a HUGE time commitment and it can become very stressful. However, I feel as though a sorority is a great way to get through college. Your sisters are your support system. Have you guys had big-little reveal yet? If not, you will most likely get your big soon and be apart of a small family within your sorority.Use those people as your support system when you're feeling down. Hang in there <3

    www.amemoryofus.blogspot.com

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