Southern Belle in Training

Fashion, Travel & Lifestyle Blog || Est. 2012 || Virginia Beach, VA

August 26, 2019

Cherry Print Dress + Unintentional Relationship Monday Thoughts.

     Happy Monday! Trying to get all of my last few summer outfits shared on the blog sooner rather than later. I love this fun printed dress for this time of year. I'm also sharing a few personal thoughts in today's post about a certain feeling I've been dealing with lately. It's something kind of new for me and I'm curious if any of you have dealt with this also.







Photos by Kate Greer 

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     Throughout the month of August, I've been trying to re-wear all of my favorite summer dresses to work! I have so many fun warm weather outfits in my closet, and I know I'll miss wearing them when fall is back in full force. So this was the month to do it. Of course this darling dress was one of the ones I wore to work! I love the fun cherry print- I think it has a real retro feel to it. I'm already excited to pull this back out again next spring/summer.

     Now let's switch gears a bit and talk about something vulnerable that's been on my heart and mind this past month. Relationship Monday is the occasional Monday blog post series that I do on singleness and dating related topics (I shared several new posts in the series last month that you can catch up on if you haven't), so I'm calling today's post an "unintentional Relationship Monday" since I wasn't quite expecting to do a whole post on this, but here we are. Sometimes blogging my thoughts and feelings is truly therapeutic, and today is one of those times!

     Something about adulthood that I don't think anyone prepared me for is the surprising painful feelings of seeing someone from your past announce an engagement (or marriage or growing family, but this month for me at least it's been news of two engagements). As I've shared on the blog before, I used to be a lot less content being single when I was in college. I used to have to constantly fight off jealous feelings when friends would get into new relationships. Fortunately- I've come a long way since then in fighting off my own anxiety and being content in whatever relationship status I'm in- single or not! I'm now thrilled when friends announce the news of a new relationship or get engaged- marriage is a gift from God and I'm so happy to see friends get to experience that. But I haven't seemed to learn how to find that same joy for when people of my past make that same type of announcement.

    This month- I found out that two different people from my past were engaged. One was a guy that I used to have very strong feelings for, and one was a formerly close female friend. So two totally different people, and two totally different relationships from my past. (Also neither of these people knew each other!) For one engagement, a mutual friend gave me the heads up that it would be happening so I'd be less shocked when it was announced. For the other, I found out through random social media stalking. After seeing the news of both, I cried both times and was in a bit of a funk for the day or two after. Ugh- I hate admitting that haha! But I like to be vulnerable with y'all on the blog and that's my truth.

     I found out the news of the guy getting engaged first, and after reacting so badly to it I was really worried that I still had lingering romantic feelings for him, even though I'd long since moved on from him (and dated other people since!). The one good thing about reacting so strongly to my former female friend announcing her engagement is that it gave me clarity that I didn't have lingering feelings for the guy! I literally felt the same type of hurt and pain with both announcements, even though one was just a platonic girlfriend. But at the same time, I felt even more confused. Why is the joy of people not in my life anymore hurting me so much?

     After some more analyzation this weekend, I came to a few potential conclusions. Could it be because I always thought I'd be engaged and/or married by this stage of life, and I'm jealous of these people? Maybe... but I really am content as a single 20-something these days. Like I said- if a friend of mine has life news like this now, I'm not jealous at all, just happy! So is it a classic case of "grass is always greener" then? Maybe... but I feel it's more complex then that. The best attempt of a conclusion that I could come to is that it's really hard to find out that people that once meant so much to you are truly moving on with their lives, and you're not apart of those milestones anymore. It sucks. I don't have a better conclusion then that currently.

    I feel like all of my thoughts on these aren't being written out very clearly and this whole post is a mess... but you know this is my blog and sometimes a girl just has to vent and write! Haha. 😊As always- I'd love to hear your thoughts? Is this something you've dealt with lately or in the past?

    Today is just five days away from my final moving day for the new apartment- I'll give more of an update on that in Wednesday's Midweek Ramblings!


     
   
     God Bless,


     xoxo Annaliese 


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7 comments

  1. Oh yes, I agree that it's more the "you're not apart of those milestones anymore" feeling. I felt the same way when my ex-best friend got married and when I announced I was pregnant (experiencing a milestone without her present.)

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  2. What a beautiful dress and gorgeous purse too! Amazing look!
    Ellibelle's Corner

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  3. What a gorgeous outfit! I love how you styled it. I cannot believe summer is almost over. Thank you for being so honest about this. I have felt this way many time before. I just saw someone who I used to be close with got engaged and it made me sad that we are not close enough anymore that i had to find out about it on social media vs. her telling me.

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  4. This dress is so feminine and flattering! I love it!
    I really appreciated your thoughts in this post. It's totally normal to feel happy and sad about news like engagements if you'd like to be engaged yourself. I've had the same feelings when friends announce pregnancies. I'm happy for them, but I also have a lot of feelings about not having kids at this point.
    -Kristen
    www.kristenwoolsey.com

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  5. Friend I feel this on SO many levels. I went through a period where it was so, so hard to see other's getting engaged because I so desperately wanted to be and it wasn't the stage of life that I was in. I don't have great advice, other than leaning on and trusting in the Lord. He worked a lot in my heart through it and I know he will protect yours too!

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  6. Gorgeous post Hun, I love this dress!! x

    Grace || www.gracelouiseofficial.blogspot.co.uk/

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  7. Beautiful photos and such a fun dress!
    Enjoyed reading your personal experience!

    www.fashionradi.com

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