Southern Belle in Training

Fashion, Travel & Lifestyle Blog || Est. 2012 || Virginia Beach, VA

July 8, 2014

On singleness.

Seeing the preview of next week's Bachelorette episode in the Dominican Republic made me miss their beautiful beaches!! (Other then that this picture has no relation to the blog post ;-) )

      In the earlier days of Southern Belle in Training, singleness was a topic that I wrote about a lot. In the past year, my blog has shifted to become more fashion focussed overall, and most of my personal posts are about college life or my faith. Those are both great topics to write personal posts about, but I started feeling over the past week like God was putting it on my heart to write about singleness on the blog again. At first I kept putting it off, but over time this post started to write itself in my head, so I knew I needed to get the words down and into a blog post draft. :-)

     What inspired this post is this wonderful article on singleness that I read last week. It's from a website for Christian teenage girls called Project Inspired. The name of the article is pretty self-explanatory: "I've Never Kissed A Guy Or Dated. Am I Being Too Picky? Advice?" and the fact that the title of it was so blunt made me want to read it!! Most of Project Inspired's articles are geared for middle or high school aged girl's, but this article was actually written for college aged single girls like myself. And I related to it so much... seriously, so much that it was almost scary!

     I don't just want to spend this whole post paraphrasing the Project Inspired article (mainly because I want y'all to read it!), but what I will say is that it's tough to be what I call "single with a purpose" during the late teen years or early 20s. These are the years when it seems so many of my peers are just hooking up with every person that is willing, and another good chunk of my peers are in the serious relationships that I so I want and desire. And wanting a serious relationship isn't a bad thing at all! It's a desire given by God, and things that come from Him are good. But, all things come in His Timing, and His Timing alone. If I want to avoid the culture of hook-ups and heartbreak that so many of my peers are partaking in, then that might mean that my season of singleness has to last awhile longer. I don't know when it will end exactly, but God does, and I know that He's shaping me into the best person that I can be in the meantime (and hopefully doing so with my future guy as well!).

     Some days are better then others days as far as singleness goes. But then there are the hard days. The days where it really does seem like all of my close girlfriends are in relationships, and it does get harder and harder to be happy for theml. The days when I have a rough day at school or at work, and all that I want is a cute guy to cuddle with and to tell me it will be okay (Just being honest here! haha). Sometimes I think about all of the places in Maine or in Charlotte that I would love to take a guy on fun dates to. Etc etc etc. But, the sad moments always pass, and I remember everything that I wrote in the previous paragraph. I am 100% trusting in God's plan for my life, including my love life! It might be hard to get through now, but I know that the Lord has my best interests at hand (and for anyone reading this, He has your best interests at hand, too!).

     Do any of you have thoughts on singleness or dating? This is definitely a topic that's very relevant to me right now ;-) so feel free to leave a comment!

     xoxo Miss ALK


  1. Great're an inspiration for others to follow! Go God!

  2. I love this post. And I can't wait to check out the article! I am 100% putting my love life in the hands of the Lord. He knows me inside and out, so I know he could pick out someone who is not only amazing, but meant for me. Just like what you said in trusting God's plan for you. For all of us! Sometimes I struggle with singleness, but I also think that this isn't my season for dating, but you never know!

    Thanks for sharing this girl :) I hope you're having a good week!

    xo, gina

  3. Being single can definitely be tough at times, but I find that when I talk to my friends about it, we all joke and laugh and realize that it's the best thing for us at the time. I don't believe in rushing life because mine has already gone through so many evolutions that I didn't anticipate. Not knowing when things are going to happen in life can be a bit stressful, but it can also be such a relief to know that the man upstairs is watching out for me!


  4. This is a great post! I completely agree with what you said about God's perfect timing. He has a perfect timing for everything, and it's always nice to remember that God has plans for us that a far greater than any plans we can make for ourselves! I also really enjoyed reading that article you shared, so thank you!

  5. He is going to place one heck of a guy in your life in His timing! I love that you are focusing on the positives of being single and using this time to develop into the lady that you want to be and who He wants you to be!

  6. You wrote the post! I am so glad you decided to post this :] Although I am currently in a relationship, I think that it is so important not to worry about finding "the one." You're right (and I agree with Ashliegh's comment above), God is going to put an amazing man in your life. For me there are so many people getting married so young and so soon after meeting/dating which is hard for me, someone who wants to get married one day but is still in a relationship (not that that's a bad thing). As my boyfriend's mom always tells me: Enjoy your singleness. Once you're married you can't get that back.

  7. That's definitely something I struggle with too! No one understands why I'm so serious about dating. They say "Go out! Have fun!" But I don't want to "have fun." I'm ready to settle down! I still get the "This would make a great date!" urge. I've started going to those date-y places by myself because I don't want to miss out on fun experiences.

  8. I love this. I definitely understand not wanting a medicore relationship that won't last - it just doesn't make sense! Especially when everyone else is out doing cool things with their significant others and posting it all over social media, I have to remind myself that someday I'll find the right person, but until He puts him in my life, I would rather be going it alone than with the wrong person.

  9. I love this so much! Especially being in a sorority, I always feel the pressure to have a date to our date functions and other various events. Thanks for writing this!
    Pi love,


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